STYLE OF MAN and more

If you look at the most recent photos of me on facebook, you’ll likely notice a few things: A.) There aren’t very recent photos of me on facebook. B.) I often wear a hat. C.) I’ve been using even more hair gel than usual.
These all stem from the fact that I’ve been in desperate need of a haircut. A few months ago I tried to grow it out, but clearly that didn’t work. (See far left). My notoriously thick, Asian hair, sticks straight out at all angles and much to my chagrin, defies all gravity and products designed to keep it down. Don’t get me wrong, I think the Asians are a beautiful people (as is evidenced by my Google search history). I just think that kind of hair looks better on real Asians than on CaucAsians like myself. I’ve yet to find a barber in the Bala Cynwyd or Manayunk who’s been able to master the Bruce Lee fade and I’ve long been intrigued by a hair salon on Main Street called Style of Man. I can think of no more masculine name for a barbershop. As a man, I often think that I would like to have more style—but not too much. Not so much elan that my love for women is doubted, just a manly kind of style. The Style of Man. In addition to a great name, this barber shop also features smoking hot girls to work on your hair. I can think of few PG experiences more sensual than that of a woman aggressively running her fingers through my hair.
At my girlfriend's urging, I finally got my hair cut at a Master Cuts in the mall because they were cheap and still open at 8:30. Since this visit Thursday night, I’ve had a new entry on the long list of Biggest Regrets of My Life. At Master Cuts, a heavily pierced Jamaican broad snipped indiscriminately at random parts of my head, leaving it comically uneven. At present, my head shape resembles a potted plant, and I can’t stop thinking of the girls who got away at Style of Man. Dan Scully and I recently discussed the brilliant business model of Style of Man, and we couldn’t help think how we could improve this already brilliant Style of Man if we were the owners. We imagined a concept hair salon in which we would make slight additions to the sign out front each day, and cut hair accordingly. What resulted was a list, nay a business concept, too grand to be contained in a top six list. Please enjoy the following while I march my ridiculous looking head back into the mall and demand a new haircut.

Style of Manny (Specializing in dreadlocks a la Manny Ramirez)
Style of Manure (Our haircuts are the shit!)
Style of Manifest Destiny (Our business will expand to every storefront until we control all of Main Street)
Style of Manatee (Specializing in pet grooming, if you have a pet manatee)
Style of Man vs. Wild (We perform mostly buzz cuts, but we have a film crew helping us)
Style of Manual Labor (Specializing in hairstyle for Mexicans)
Style of Manson (We’re not so good with hair, but we’ll carve an X into your forehead)
Style of Man Eaters (Specializing in Hall & Oates mustaches and mullets)
Style of Man of the House (Get a classic Tommy Lee Jones look or a Jonathon Taylor Thomas mane)
Style of Mane (Catering exclusively to Lions. And JTT for his work as Simba in the Lion King)
Style of Immanuel Kant (Everyone gets the same haircut, regardless of the situation)
Style of Manilow (a la Barry Manilow)
Style of Manheim Steam Roller (featuring intense Christmas music with lots of bells)
Style of Manila (catering to dignitaries from the Philippines, and folder enthusiasts)
Style of Mangione, Chuck (If you don’t like your haircut, this cool hat will make you Feel So Good)
Style of Manny Pacquiao
Style of Mandalay Bay (for big nights out in Vegas)
Style of Manet (NOT Monet, there’s a difference!)
Style of Man Ray (For that Modernist look everyone’s going for)
Style of Mangina (We’d rather not explain)
Style of Manchester United (get any hairstyle sported by David Beckham)
Style of Manwich
Style of Mantis (You’ll look so good, your mate will want to eat you up. Literally, bite your head off)
Style of Manzanas
Style of Maniac McGee (Newberry Medal Recipient for best boys’ haircuts)
Style of Manfred Man
Style of Five Man Electrical Band. (You’ve got to have a membership card to get inside. And Long-haired, freaky people need not apply.)
Style of Mayonnaise. (Instead of hair gel, we use egg yolk and vegetable oil)
Style of Man in the Box (If you’re having a bad hair day, we will come and save you)
Style of Man of War (for Jellyfish)
Style of Man o’War (for race horses)
Style of Manheim, Camryn (long hair for fat girls)